ANDREW BISS

This is an extract from the fifth story from The Impressionists . In this one, a woman in the viewing room of a funeral home addresses the body in the coffin before her. This is a very short one, hence the short extract. I hope you enjoy it. Organ Failure Well, well, just take a look at you…all scrubbed and polished and ready for inspection. I have to hand it to them, they really did a good job on you. Who could imagine seeing you now that such a short time ago you were lying in a pool of your own vomit, your organs finally having decided to give up on you…just like everyone else. Except me. What did they stuff in your cheeks? Cotton, is it? Or some synthetic stuff? No, I think it’s cotton…the look, the feel of cotton. Cotton mouth – how ironic. Well, whatever it is, it’s a good look for you. You were always so gaunt and drawn, but now you look…well, quite lively. What a shame. Still, it’ll make for a good send off. And like they say, you never get a second chance to make a last impres...

Yes it is. My so-called ‘secret writing project’ is just about complete. The reason I’ve been keeping it under wraps from almost everyone I know is because I wasn’t sure it would work. But I think it has and it’s now time for me to push it out into the world. I have written my first novel. A short novel (about 27,000 words). More precisely – and this is why I thought it a little tricky – I have adapted one of my plays into a novel. Yes, strange indeed, as it’s the wrong way around. Novels are adapted into plays, but virtually never the reverse. However, I had strong feeling several months ago that this particular play could possibly work quite well as a novel. Encouraged by my e-friend, the excellent writer Helen Smith , I took the plunge and went to work. This was like learning a whole new language for me, as the mediums are very different in their execution. However, after a lot of research and a leap of faith I began the process. And I have to say I enjoyed it greatly. I do like wri...

I recently received word that my play "Cafe Grotesquerie" had been selected for an annual one-act festival in New York entitled "Vignettes for the Apocalypse" produced by a very interesting company called EndTimes Productions. I thought I'd have a lot of difficulty finding a home for this particular play, oddity that it is, but I must say it would seem to be right at home in this festival. It's billed as focusing on pieces with horror, sci-fi, political, or dystopian themes, and my play most definitely belongs in the latter category. I'm very much looking forward to seeing what they do with it, and more than happy that this strange little play wasn't as hard to place as I'd imagined. Like they say, everybody's somebody's baby.